Sex is already weird as hell, and I thought it was hard enough trying to figure out where all the body parts should go.
(And figuring out where they SHOULDN'T go, you feel me?
As a Dating and Relationship Coach for Women over 40, I conducted a survey and asked women to tell me their biggest dating challenge as a woman in her 40s, 50s and beyond. You are merely a victim of nasty and sad circumstance, rather than a strong, smart woman in charge of her life. Quickly dismissing men is most often about self-protection and reliving past experiences in the present.
The idea that there aren’t any quality men is a myth. Why do you hold on to this as if it were truth; like it’s a reality of life that you must endure?
Most just tell me that I’m too attractive to be a virgin. I’m finally taking steps to break out of my shell and take a risk. Have you ever considered losing your virginity to a sex worker? But I don’t think I’d be ever to do something like that. I’m not needing love, but some sort of emotional connection is necessary. I want it to be with someone that cares about me and someone that I can trust.
What do your friends say about the fact you’re a virgin? What about your family—are you open about it with them? If you could lose your virginity to any celebrity, who would it be? Is there anything that scares about having sex for the first time?
There are two things you can do that will immediately improve your experience with men: 1. Know what you want and must have, and make sure it’s the “Grownup You” doing the picking; not the 18-year-old who still expects all kinds of wacky things that no longer matter and wouldn’t make you happy anyway. Aren’t your “quirks” what you want men to love about you? • How does this belief impact your actions (or inaction), and how is that affecting your outcomes? Yep, that’s a surefire way to avoid ever being hurt or rejected.
Be willing to forgo the idea of perfection and find a REAL man. ) Here are some action steps to get you started: • Get honest with yourself by getting to the core of your belief that there are no quality men. If you believed otherwise, how would it change your dating experiences? (Listen, I was the master of this, but finally learned how I consistently self sabotaged.
And when I saw it, and dealt with it, my life changed.
What sort of reaction do you get when you tell them?
Some women don’t believe me, they think that I’m telling a lie in an attempt to get laid. When you think about your first time, what do you want it to be like?